Tears of Hope

Everyday, I spend a few minutes by myself… staring at nothing… searching… crying. Everyday since I found out, I think about it. Hoping… wanting… needing.

Often people walk up to me, and ask what’s wrong. My normal response is nothing. I’m lying! I’m not always sad though. Those tears, and red eyes, aren’t sad… they’re hoping. Hoping for the day he cracks out of his shell. The day he looks at me and says: “Dad, remember when I had to”. Hoping for that day to have a meaningful conversation.

Oh I will… damn skippy I will. I will have that conversation with him. I will raise him up and say: “Welcome back Chase! We missed you!” He will beat this. We are… HE IS better than this. I know this, because hope told me.

Chase, I know you’re in there. I hear you. We’re working on it. With time, we will get you out of there, just be patient. This cage you are in, won’t hold you back forever Mommy and Daddy will pull you out, and when we do, the good times will roll. Hope and determination is on our side, and we will do this!


I’m a grown man, before I found out, many would call me cold, unemotional, even wrong.
Today, I’m a different person. Hope. I’m not crying… I’m hoping!

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